Canadian Economic Stimulas

Posted from email rec’d Dec 8, 2009

Sometime soon, we taxpayers may receive an Economic Stimulus payment.
This is a very exciting new program. I will explain it using the Question and Answer format:
Q. What is an Economic Stimulus payment?
A.. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.

Q. Where will the government get this money?
A. From taxpayers.

Q. So the government is giving me back my own money?
A. Only a smidgen.

Q. What is the purpose of this payment?
A. The plan is that you will use the money to purchase a high-definition TV
set, thus stimulating the economy.

Q. But isn’t that stimulating the economy of China ?
A. Shut up.

Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the Canadian economy by spending your stimulus check wisely:
* If you spend the stimulus money at Wal-Mart, the money will go to China .
* If you spend it on gasoline, your money will go to the Arabs.
* If you purchase a computer, it will go to India .
* If you purchase fruit and vegetables, it will go to Mexico, Honduras and Guatemala .
* If you buy a car, it will go to Japan or South Korea .
* If you purchase useless stuff, it will go to Taiwan .
* If you pay your credit cards off, or buy stock, it will go to
management bonuses and they will hide it offshore.

Instead, keep the money in Canada by:
1 spending it at yard sales, or
2 going to a hockey game, or
3 spending it on prostitutes, or
4 beer or
5 tattoos..

(These are the only Canadian owned businesses still operating in Canada .)

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About lorrystdavid

I'm a retired guy who loves to get involved in community affairs and issues especially when I feel there is some injustice involved or that I have a valid point of view. I still believe that the pen is mightier than the sword although lately, I am wondering if this is still true.
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